I’m going to Mike’s agent’s Halloween party Saturday night, and I’ve been really struggling with finding a costume…the last night when I was going through my closet to find my glass slippers I came across my wedding dress…which looks kind of like a Greek goddess gown…so I’m going as Electra. Why Electra, you ask? Why not Medea, or Antigone, or Athena, or Venus…? I have to go as Electra because my date is 41, and I really need to make the “Daddy issues” joke before anyone else can, you know?

So last night I was watching Heroes (So.Fucking.Good. I've only seen an episode and a half, and I am completely hooked) when I got a text message. So here's how my text conversation began:

?: "HI there-how r u?"
K: I’m well. Who is this?

Side Note: I hate text messaging because I can’t stand to use the shitty grammar required to respond with any amount of speed.

?: Rolls royce-very shy blonde guy!
K: [ugh. That fucking douche from Friday night.] Right—because the car is the important thing. Seriously, I’m rolling my eyes at you right now [it took me like, 25 minutes to type all that into my phone].
?: I was trying to help you remember me-did u get my email today?
K: I did.
?: And u didn’t write back because…..
K: I was busy.

I’ll spare you the rest. Seriously, this guy is 39 years old, and he’s trying to ask me out with text messages about his car. And for me this isn’t like, oh look at our witty banter! See how we argue but we’re really in love…just like a screwball comedy!” I am genuinely irritated by him…mostly because he seems to be one of those guys who womanize to make up for their insecurities. Add the Rolls and Porsche in there, and you’ve got some serious overcompensation.

More importantly, I think I’m going to cut my hair short and dye it dark again. I’m tired of the blonde-ish light brown thing. I’m going as Cinderella for JoJo’s Halloween party, though, so I want to wait until after that.